Last weekend was a fascinating time of contrasting events.

It was the first time I’ve ever done two events in one weekend, and the events themselves couldn’t have been more different.

One was in a traditional church. One was in a very contemporary church.

One was in a church were response is quiet. One was in a church that’s demonstrative.

One was a fairly new kind of event for the group. One had lots of similar events under their belt.

The wonderful thing to see was how both events were equally awesome. Jesus showed up and did His work in both places, and you just can’t beat Jesus at work no matter the setting!

One lesson I re-learned in doing both events is to be ready for anything.

You girls know that I’m releasing a book in July called Breaking Up with Perfect, which is about our journey to let go of our own ideas about “Perfect”. (Here’s a sneak peek!)

My ideas of perfection have also extended into women’s events, but the more I see success in contrasting events, the more I understand the importance of appreciating differences instead of clinging to my own narrow view.

Also, this new-to-me flexibility has helped me to go with the flow even when things go wrong at an event. After all, there are no perfect people, so there are no perfect events!

It has helped me to be gracious when:

• Someone introduces me by the wrong name.
• The tech people can’t figure out how to integrate my technology with theirs.
• The batteries die in the sound pack.
• Breakout leaders are confused because they haven’t been given the questions I sent.
• I feel like I’m falling off a cliff every time my high-heel gets caught in a tiny crack in the stage, and I flail my arms around like I’m falling 1000 ft.
• An insect is crawling up my arm & the audience is watching the bug instead of listening to me. (This has actually happened at two separate events–once with a stink bug & once with a spider!!)

These are all things that have happened to me over the years, and I’ve learned to deal with them with increasing patience and humor. I’m a mess, but I’m growing!

Here are a few tips for handling the things that inevitably go wrong during an event:

• Send your technology ahead so the team can give it a trial run. I usually send links from files in DropBox.
• Write an introduction to give to the event planner. I let them know that’s it’s optional, but usually it’s a relief to her to have the help.
• Bring some emergency supplies: batteries, skin-colored tape (for those over-the-ear mics that just won’t stay in place), an extra copy of all your handouts and discussion questions, insect spray (just kidding!)
• Carry along an extra pair of shoes. Seriously. I’ve started carrying flats to every event in case of emergency (like catching heels) or simple foot fatigue.
• Make sure to arrive overflowing with Jesus and with your sense of humor intact. (Sometime I’ll tell you how that stink bug actually saved me as I was sinking.)

I’d love to hear your funny stories of things that have gone wrong and your tips to be ready in every circumstance!

I’m a retreat girl. There’s no doubt, but I had forgotten since I hadn’t led one in a while.

I think I love retreats so much because I’m highly relational. Retreats give time and space for women to begin to break down the walls and get to know each other quickly on a deeper level.

Last weekend, I led a beach retreat (heavenly fellowship located near heaven), and the deep sharing started from the get-go as each woman introduced herself. Boy, there was a lot of pain and hurt behind some of those beautiful faces, and I immediately began reassessing my message. In my mind, I cut and pasted before I began to speak based on some of the things I heard in the introductions.

In a non-retreat setting, we rarely get much insight into the faces looking into ours as we speak, but it’s important to try to think through who will be filling the chairs at an event.


Photo Credit

Some of the blanks can be filled in as we talk to event planners. We can ask questions like:

• Will there be both males and females at the event or just women?
• What is the age range?
• Are there any special populations I should be aware of? (ie. miliary wives, grief groups, homeless, etc)

But we need to think beyond those basic categories. This weekend I was more aware than ever that I need to realize statistically there will be certain circumstances represented in a group of women:

• There will be married women.
• There will be women that have never married.
• There will be women whose marriage is in crisis.
• There will be divorced women.
• There will be women whose husbands had an affair.
• There will be women who have had abortions.
• There will be women who have experienced a significant death recently.
• There will be women who are in the midst of infertility.
• There will be women who are struggling as moms.

You get the gist. Although I’m tender-hearted and try to be sensitive, I realized this weekend that I hadn’t run my message through the filter of considering the hurts in my audience. I was speaking as a happily married woman with children who are doing pretty well (Right now. They’re young, so I’m humble enough to know that could change tomorrow!).

I don’t think that it’s a bad thing to speak from my personal, current perspective, but I want to make sure I treat my audience with love and care.

Being a speaker is a huge responsibility. How are you careful to manage that responsibility?